What Is A TERF?

5 min read

Yes, this question has probably been asked so many times it may be exhausted, and exhausting for that matter.

It’s possible most people reading this might be aware of the letters “TERF” stand for “Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist” but also that this is a pretty dubious label because first of all many, or most of those who are called “Terfs” may not be radical at all but Reactionary (protecting the status quo), and if we understand the status quo as being patriarchal, misogynist, then they aren’t feminist either.

I think terfs are one way of grouping just some of the people who are hostile towards trans people, or ideas around gender that don’t fit the normative narrative, there are other groupings, and probably there is some diversity in beliefs, and methodology within this terfdom.

There may no single definition of what a terf is, and I don’t think it would be healthy to try to achieve one.

Here is one definition that I have though.

A terf can be someone who is intellectually intelligent, they may hold good knowledge of many subjects, they may be eloquent, charismatic, a well known writer for example (insert protest chant about you know who here if you like). This can make them particularly difficult to argue with. They have the intelligence around language, to be complex, and have relatively complex arguments which they may use (intentionally or unconsciously even) to have people either simply accepting their words because they sound intelligent, or people bogged down in seemingly never ending intellectual arguments.

What they may lack to some degree though, is emotional intelligence. They may have some, within a particular sphere, but it may be limited, based on bias, to a particular group. A terf may experience empathy for some, but ‘switch it off’ for others. Crucially, a terf may be disconnected from themself, they may not feel, or may deny the complexity of their own inner self.

Feelings, feeling emotions, can be painful for some, especially with trauma, and there may also be an argument to say that there is gender based trauma in our culture. We have layers of privilege, complex hierarchy with that.

I think we may also have a culture that largely cultivates and perpetuates the suppression and avoidance of feelings and emotions. There is some evidence that this has a gender basis too. For example, different standards placed on women in terms of displaying or perhaps even feeling anger. Traditionally it may be that showing anger has been considered ‘wrong’ for women (it’s not), but encouraged with men.

All of this and more, may have created a situation where as a culture, we are simply not as well equipped to expose ourselves to our own deepest emotions as we could be. Life provides us with many forms of avoidance behaviour, things that provide seemingly quick, simple relief, such as religion that teaches us simple mantras about God and creation (yet really these are probably much more complex than the common understanding of the religious codes), and consumerism (I feel shit, I don’t want to get into it, I’m going to go get a fix by buying something).

Something else that can become a means of avoidance: causes. The cause, for example, of women’s rights, is a just one in my opinion, it is more complex that shouting a slogan though, and for getting back to the original topic of this point: It is more complex than some simple, possibly over simplified idea of biology. Even the actual science of biology, is more complex than the thing terfs often called biology.

The cause is just, because it can consume a person’s life, fill up so much space, there is little room left to feel what is underneath.

But then, most of this is not exclusive to terfs.

A terf might be someone who has this detachment, disconnection with themselves, they may be making it easier to avoid potentially complex, seemingly conflicting thoughts and emotions about people, relationships, humanity, by reducing people to reproductive capability, chromosomes, genitals, things that are somewhat tangible. My opinion is that sex itself isn’t a tangible thing, I can’t point at it and say there it is, I can point to the things that are deemed to define sex, but then may only have two categories, and it is not clear what things are essential to have in each category or not. There are then, due to my experiences, and perhaps my gender, how I am treated in society, emotions attached to all of this, which might be painful to sit with.

I can choose to accept that the reality of humanity is complex, but that may mean having to really search my feelings, and be uncomfortable, or I can choose to subscribe to the over simplification, which can mean forcing myself or even others into boxes which don’t fit well, or just react based on the default, not think any of this at all, accept the normative. The normative is based on the over simplification.

So I think in that respect, a terf is more likely to be the person who attempts to force humanity into boxes that don’t really fit, in a poor attempt to manage feelings, feelings around safety too.

A terf may be someone with poor grasp of risk. Fallacies are another way of over simplifying life, making it feel easier to manage, and so risk is assessed based on fallacies, and fallacies often based on faulty statistical analysis. Crucially, finally coming round to the issue of trans people, like me, with have the over simplification of life based on biology, we have the over simplification of life by denying the importance of feelings (and perhaps specifically the feelings of trans people) with phrases like “my facts don’t care about your feelings”, the over simplification or even denial of gender as being different to sex, the over simplification of men with the implication that men might be inherently dangerous due to biology (more likely a bit of nature, and a lot of nurture, cultural complexity), the over simplification of women as being defined by some over simplified biology largely or wholly based on reproductive organs, and the over simplification of trans people into these over simplified boxes.

When it comes down to feeling emotions though, it’s possible it can appear simple (but the complexity is in experience).

There’s plenty of gloating over ‘victory’, smug looks, displays of anger (often aggressive), but underneath, I think some terfs are just scared, perhaps understandably, some might not be really scared, they are cruel, they enjoy a feeling of power, some are a bit of both.

Ultimately though, none of this is justification for treating trans people, however they define us, the way they do. But then they have dehumanised us in their minds, and have dismissed the importance of our feelings, they have what they see as science, almost science as a God (and even case law to treat their views like a faith), they have groupthink, collective narcissism, leaving them feeling justified in their cruelty, because to them it’s not cruel, they are simply right, and we are to them whoever they say we are.

The most likely result of all of this, greater disconnection, and the perpetuation of the very culture and system that harms everyone, including the terfs.